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Вы настоящий Мосваровский задрот? | Наброс | Мобильная версия
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Вы настоящий Мосваровский задрот?
24.11.2013 Чисто поржать

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a_3f2991d2

Вы настоящий Мосваровский задрот, если…

  • если включая утюг, чтобы погладить, прикидываете сколько тугриков упадет с жены
  • если по средам вы никогда не назначаете встреч и совещаний на 14.30 и 16.30
  • если вы заставляете свою кошку бегать по дому и зарабатывать медальки
  • если бухгалтерию у себя на работе вы ласково называете «черной»
  • если вы неосознанно не любите менять в доме лампочки
  • если видя на улице Бентли тихо ухмыляетесь, потому что у вас уже Танк
  • если увидев крысу в метро вы рефлекторно начинаете раздеваться
  • если вы уверены, что в автомобильную канистру помещается ровно 50 нефти
  • если в стычке с кем-то вы прикидываете сможете ли выбить ему зуб и не включен ли сейчас пацифик
  • если, спускаясь в московскую подземку, ищете на карте станцию Маргинальная 
  • если вы дарите девушке плюшевых медведей по десять штук за раз
  • если слово “баланс” вызывает у вас приступ тошноты или нервное подергивание глаза
  • если вы покупаете в магазине творожок даниссимо чтобы прибавить +10% к выноске
  • если вы торопитесь открыть подарки, как только их получили, а то “потом порежут”
  • если переходя в квартире из комнаты в комнату вы останавливаетесь на 30 секунд и пьете энергетик
  • если рыжие мужики вызывают у вас смутное чувство недоверия
  • если пони для вас не только лошади, а корни есть не только у растений
  • если вы пытаетесь научить бабушку фармить и патрулировать
  • если вы храните деньги в конвертах по 10000
  • если вы видите на улице человека гуляющего с догом и в тайне ему завидуете
  • если в баре заказывая коктейль, обязательно прикидываете сколько стат к силе и ловкости он прибавит
  • если синих пассатижей у вас дома больше 500 штук
  • если покупая зефир в шоколаде ищите красный, синий, зеленый
  • если в магазине одежды вы обязательно приобретаете сразу весь сет, чтобы осталась вешалка
  • если Новый год, Первое мая и День рождения Москвы, вы всегда планируете провести дома, набивая снежинки
  • если, живя не в Москве, вы уверены, что не заблудились бы там никогда — слева Тверская, справа Арбат
  • если привыкли делать все дела пяти (пятнадцати)-минутными отрезками
  • если боксерские перчатки вы называете валуйками
  • если вы уверены, что имя актера Шаца — Моня
  • ну и наконец, если проснувшись утром вы первым делом читаете Наброс :)
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23 комментария

  1. Warning: Use of undefined constant opentag - assumed 'opentag' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/npaskov/public_html/nabros/wp-content/plugins/hidden-content/hidden-content.php on line 152

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    Старо как мир, да вся правда о тру задроте в этом тексте....

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  2. Warning: Use of undefined constant opentag - assumed 'opentag' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/npaskov/public_html/nabros/wp-content/plugins/hidden-content/hidden-content.php on line 152

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    Warning: Use of undefined constant op - assumed 'op' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/npaskov/public_html/nabros/wp-content/plugins/hidden-content/hidden-content.php on line 74

    последним пунктом подловила) а остальное не обо мне))

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    • Психопат


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      Warning: Use of undefined constant op - assumed 'op' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/npaskov/public_html/nabros/wp-content/plugins/hidden-content/hidden-content.php on line 74

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      Warning: Use of undefined constant op - assumed 'op' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/npaskov/public_html/nabros/wp-content/plugins/hidden-content/hidden-content.php on line 74

      Та же хрень! :D Утром мажу бутерброд - сразу мысль: а как Наброс?!

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  3. Warning: Use of undefined constant opentag - assumed 'opentag' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/npaskov/public_html/nabros/wp-content/plugins/hidden-content/hidden-content.php on line 152

    Warning: Use of undefined constant op - assumed 'op' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/npaskov/public_html/nabros/wp-content/plugins/hidden-content/hidden-content.php on line 74

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    Warning: Use of undefined constant op - assumed 'op' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/npaskov/public_html/nabros/wp-content/plugins/hidden-content/hidden-content.php on line 74

    >> и в тайне ему
    рукалицо

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  4. Луноход


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    Петросян? Или Степаненко текст писала?

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  5. Warning: Use of undefined constant opentag - assumed 'opentag' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/npaskov/public_html/nabros/wp-content/plugins/hidden-content/hidden-content.php on line 152

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    Утром вытираю нос — сразу мысль: а как Наброс?

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  6. Секретутка


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    Шефу делаю отсос, с мыслями- а как Наброс?

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    • одиночка


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      ухаха. зачотно

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    • Warning: Use of undefined constant opentag - assumed 'opentag' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/npaskov/public_html/nabros/wp-content/plugins/hidden-content/hidden-content.php on line 152

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      ахаххааха, МумийТролл спалился...знаем теперь как у тебя утро начинается)

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      • Warning: Use of undefined constant opentag - assumed 'opentag' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/npaskov/public_html/nabros/wp-content/plugins/hidden-content/hidden-content.php on line 152

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        аватарки - пацтава пацтав))

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        • Warning: Use of undefined constant opentag - assumed 'opentag' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/npaskov/public_html/nabros/wp-content/plugins/hidden-content/hidden-content.php on line 152

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          не то слово))

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      шедеврально))

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  7. МумийТролл


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    Лестер обнову сделать не смог - представил как ее наброс обосрет!

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  8. Warning: Use of undefined constant opentag - assumed 'opentag' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/npaskov/public_html/nabros/wp-content/plugins/hidden-content/hidden-content.php on line 152

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    Сделал Михалычу на жопе засос и побежал читать Наброс

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  9. Михалыч


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    Сука болит на жопе засос, надо заблочить Дулину Наброс!

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  10. Warning: Use of undefined constant opentag - assumed 'opentag' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/npaskov/public_html/nabros/wp-content/plugins/hidden-content/hidden-content.php on line 152

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    Заебали писать про засос, сидите молча читайте Наброс

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  11. Наброс


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    Мы вам не какой-то сраный засос, мы охуенный могучий Наброс!

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  12. Warning: Use of undefined constant opentag - assumed 'opentag' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/npaskov/public_html/nabros/wp-content/plugins/hidden-content/hidden-content.php on line 152

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    Ты мудак и хуесос, если не читал Наброс!

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  13. Психопат


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    Пацталом! Вот это ржачь! Но почту на хуй нужно менять, что бы Наброс не проебать! :D

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  14. Warning: Use of undefined constant opentag - assumed 'opentag' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/npaskov/public_html/nabros/wp-content/plugins/hidden-content/hidden-content.php on line 152

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    А мне вот эти больше всего понравились:

    • если, живя не в Москве, вы уверены, что не заблудились бы там никогда — слева Тверская, справа Арбат
    • Увидев крысу в метро вы рефлекторно начинаете раздеваться
    • если переходя в квартире из комнаты в комнату вы останавливаетесь на 30 секунд и пьете энергетик
    • если боксерские перчатки вы называете валуйками

    Кстати, я порой и в прям называю их валуйками… Мдя раньше и не задумывался над этим…

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  15. ВнуГ_ПрЕзЕдЕнта


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    траважок даёт плюс30% к внимке, а не выноске

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      иди уроки учи

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      • ВнуГ_ПрЕзЕдЕнта


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        нутизадрот йасся!) (.) (.)

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